Radical Viewpoint: If your mate did not change he/she would become boring and you would grow tired of their company. So hope and pray for your mate to change, because without change you have stagnation, and your relationship is doomed. Life is change. Change is the only thing that is permanent.

General Viewpoint: When you resist change, your resist life. And there is a Universal law that says, “What you resist you draw you.” As long as you resist something, you are locked into it and you will perpetuate its influence in your life.

In Callings, Gregg LeVoy says, “We want to protect ourselves from change, because we’re concerned with security. But more often than not the result is a reduction of our life-force. Our soul shivers and suffers. But we need to understand something about security. It isn’t secure. The whole concept of security is contrary to the central fact of existence?life changes. When we avoid change, we isolate ourselves from living.” And misery will arise out of our resistance.

Common Causes: Fear. We fear that we will lose something. There is only one problem that exists between human beings: fear. Fear is responsible for all disturbances, large or small, international or interpersonal. Hatred, anger, possessiveness, tension, anxiety, greed, inhibition, stress, frustrations, hang-ups, phobias, insecurities ... all are fear-based emotions. Upon accepting that the only problem between people is fear, we can simplify even more. There is only one fear: The fear of being unable to cope with a situation. But you can cope with your partner’s mid-life crisis, or perimenopause or menopause, or illness, or financial setbacks.