Just because you are still with your partner does not mean that either of you are living for the other person. Even though you are “here” perhaps one or both of you are mentally “gone.” If this sounds like your relationship, try to analyze when you got lost. What happened? There may have been an “event” or a series of events that lead to the mental state of both of you. If this is true, try to think of things you can do about it now, if anything can be done.

Perhaps one of the main reasons one or both of you are “mentally gone” from the relationship is because you had different expectations of what marriage was going to be. You thought you married one person, yet he/she turned out to be someone completely different. If this is true, you need to figure out who is the “true” person: the first or the second. If it is the latter, then you have to realize that your partner may never change. This does not mean that you shouldn’t try to repair the relationship, but it does mean that you might need to consider other options if it doesn’t work.

It might be you who is “mentally gone.” If so, then you are probably living for yourself, and not your partner. Maybe your mate seems distant, depressed, or moody. If you notice these things, talk about it. It may be a silent cry for help – a plea to pay attention to him/her and the relationship.

Relationships are about so much more than merely occupying the same space. If you think you are blind to your partner’s needs and desires, wake up. Wake up and work on the relationship. Wake up and acknowledge your selfishness. If you don’t, you may hear your partner say goodbye because “all you live for is yourself … not me.”